Looking Fear in the Face

When reading a book today (Strong Women, Soft Hearts) ... yes, corny title, but full of amazing truths, I realized some things about fear. Fear is pretty common. Almost every major or minor life step that we take involves it. Whether deciding where to go to school, what to do with the next few years of your life, who to marry, where to live, what job to take, or even how to speak to your friend about a misunderstanding or to confront your sister about a dangerous road she's going down. And the reason that fear is there is because usually important decisions (no matter how big or small they are) involve an aspect of growth. And growth involves risk and discomfort. But the results are well worth it. G0d uses these things - little and big moments of decision and action, as well as the risk and discomfort that comes with it to stretch us - to bring us into closer relationship with Him through requiring us to trust Him more.

Now, fear is not to be commended per say - the B1ble says not to fear. But, for risk of sounding repetitive, we shouldn't fear our fear. It is, in a sense, normal. Yes, it needs to be taken to G0d, but don't think that you are inhuman or a psycho or a freak because there is fear involved. It is what you do with that fear that matters - will you dwell on the things you are afraid of (people misjudging you, failing, etc.) and believe lies, or will you apply G0d's truth to the situation and to your heart, allowing yourself to admit that, yes, this is something scary, while trusting our Heavenly Father to provide what you need to do it and get through it - if it's something you believe is according to what He wants. (And even if it's not, His grace and mercy will be there to lift you back up and bring you through it anyway. Because of His great love for you).

So, I still have a lot of questions about this issue - how much of fear is good that drives you to seek G0d, and how much of it is sin from not trusting Him. This is something I want to research more in the B1ble, but I will close with these thoughts. I tend to think that instead of running from situations that are scary or considering ourselves unstable if we fear something, I would argue rather that those whose decisions and life choices are not in the least bit scary (in other words, are not requiring them to go against their sinful natures and tendencies into the uncomfortable, or are not requiring them to lean on their Father) might want to reevaluate if they indeed are surrendering their life to Him. Whether they are taking up their cross daily, or whether they are simply putting themselves in comfortable, easy, non-faith-requiring situations that are costing them their souls. Join me in analyzing the decisions you are facing in your daily life, and whether they are accompanied by a fear of sorts, that makes you run into the refuge of the arms of your Father, as you lean on Him to make the difficult, but worth it, growth-producing decisions of life.

The Beginning of the End

How do you do it? How do you say goodbye to the most wonderful people you've ever had a chance to share life with? To the people who have been your community, your co-workers, your friends, and your family for the past two years? To the people who know you better than anyone else, and to whom you've shared part of your deepest thoughts and struggles with, yet still love and accept you? To the people who have watched and spurred your growth from a girl just out of college to a young woman ready to take the next step in life? To the people you've laughed with, fought with, prayed with, and cried with?

I've had transitions in my life - I've moved away from people or people have moved away from me, but always there was the hope, or at least the illusion, that we would all still be in the same area and we could all still get together often. But this time, though my life may end up coming alongside of one or some of these wonderful people again, I know it will never come alongside of all of them again at once. These past two years have been the rarest, most precious gift I could have ever asked for. And though I know that it isn't over yet, it is hard to find the balance between beginning to grieve and prepare my heart for the loss and enjoying and making the most of these last couple of months.

To the men and women who have been my shoulders to cry on, my wonderful friends, and my mentors and sources of wisdom; to the young women who have been my sisters and who have loved me unconditionally, to the children who have been my nieces and nephews, my smiles and hugs and precious joys; and to the young men who have been my brothers, my supporters, my much-needed dose of laughter, and my simultaneous growth and comfort, I love you all more than words can say.

I aim to make the most of the time we have left together, and, after we go our separate ways, to hold you dear in my heart forever.

Yours,
Mich